Pictures From after the Rain!

See previous post for more details!

A Great Weekend!

Well, I guess the newness of having a blog wore off a little. It has been a couple of days since my last post. 

To catch up- The Braswell Family had an unbelievable great weekend. Here is how it went.

Friday, we ate dinner at Damn Good Pies. They have some of the best pizza in town. Ross did well at the restaurant. He joined 2 different tables throughout the course of dinner. He has never met a stranger! Off to bed. Ross got off his mattress 3 times, so it was back in the crib for him. 

Saturday, we woke up around 7:00 and went for a walk. On our walk we got caught in the rain. Ross LOVED IT. He enjoyed getting wet and loved trying to catch the rain in his hands. After showers and getting dressed, we headed to Community Bakery for coffee and breakfast. Ross helped a total stranger play cards. We then went on a hunt for scooters. Leah really likes the idea of saving money on gas. We hit 3 different stores that carry scooters. The family unanimously chose the Vespa scooters. Ross even tried to climb up on them. We did let him sit on the seats of a few. Leftover pizza for lunch. Then it was nap time. But, Ross had other plans. He played in his bed for an hour with no sleep. This means that Leah slept and I listened to Ross play. Someday, I hope I can settle when he is not. So, we got up and went to a couple of furniture stores. We are looking for a dinning room table and chairs. Then, we picked up some chicken from Fresh Market. The 3 of us enjoyed an elegant dinner at home. Later in the evening, we interviewed a possible new nanny for Ross. Off to bed. 

Sunday, I woke up at 6:00 and got Leah up. We got ready for a walk and then woke Ross up. He opened his eyes and the first word out of his mouth was walk. After our walk, we enjoyed a restful morning enjoying coffee and the newspaper. Off to St. Margaret's 9:00 service. We love our church. Ross got to play in the nursery. Then we drove home. Ross fell asleep in the car and slept in Leah's arms at home for an hour. He is still battling a fever bug. We think he is teething. Then it was lunch with Bebbie and Erin. Ross had a small meltdown, due to his fever coming back. A 2 hour nap was enjoyed by some. My mom called to see if Ross could come play. She had found a turtle and wanted him to see it. Leah got a haircut. After a couple of hours playing in Mimi and Papa's backyard it was time to go to the grocery store. Bebbie came over for dinner. And then Ross got to see Pia for the first time in 2 weeks. He is so glad his baby cousin is back from Texas. Ross went off to bed without a peep. Leah and I got to get some office work and calendar planning accomplished.  (Legend: Bebbie= Leah's mom, Mimi and Papa= my parents, Pia= my brother Vincent's 6 month old named Sophia- Ross nicknamed her Pia).

It was a busy weekend, but one that has truly rejuvenated me. Time for the tired E-mama to get some sleep.

The Berm

Today was a busy day for the Braswell family. Ross had a restless night last night due to fever. He ended up spending most of the night with us, tossing and turning. Needless to say there was not much sleep for any of us. Leah worked a normal day. I worked a shift in the ER. It was actually a very pleasant ER shift. We had a family dinner at home and then it was off to Dickey-Stephens Baseball Field.

We have 2 box seat season tickets next to my family's 4 seats. Are seats are in a great location- along first base and just down from the beer garden. We usually make it to at least one game each series. Ross loves going. 

Tonight, we enjoyed the game in conjunction with a Little Rock Sewanee, Hendrix, and Rhodes Alumni gathering. It was fun to see people we knew from high school, people Leah went to college with, and a couple from med school and residency. It was fun for me to be the only Millsaps alum at the event. All four of these colleges belong to the same conference- the SCAC. Hopefully the next event will also include Millsaps grads in the Little Rock area. This event was located out in the berm.  I had to ask Leah what the berm was. Not sure where the word comes from, but it is the grassy area behind center field. Ross ran around and enjoyed all the berm had to offer.

Ross is a very independent child. A trait he inherited from Leah. When we sit in our normal seats, he is confined to the row of family members. Out in the Berm he can run around, peek over the fence into the bullpens, or sit in the grass and enjoy the game. He loves having the ability to roam free or climb in one of his moms' laps to watch the game. As Ross is growing up and becoming more independent, he is also teaching me that it is okay to find your own place in this world knowing that the security of family will always be there. I am learning this from him through his ability to go play with total strangers, but then return to his moms for a quick hug or a rest in one of our laps.

 I know I have said this already on my blog and I will probable say it a million more times, I am very blessed to have such a wonderful son and an amazing wife.

Ross' Mama is Home!

This was the first time Ross was aware of Leah being gone. He had to talk to her on the phone multiple times a day. He wanted to look at pictures of her on my phone and on my computer. He was so excited today when we got to pick her up from the airport. Leah was due home last night, but due to weather issues, she did not get home until this morning at 0900. It was such a joy to see her and to see Ross light up when she got into the car. What an amazing thing the love a child is! We had a great Braswell family day!

On a totally different note, I made another big change in my life today. I cut my hair off. This is the shortest haircut I can remember. I told the person who cuts my hair, that I was going to be 30 in 2 weeks and wanted a major change. I will try to post pictures in the next couple of days. Change can be a good thing, a lesson I am having to learn and relearn all the time.

Frustration with the Travel Industry

I am very frustrated right now. Gas prices are outrageous and when flying you have to know that at any moment in time you could be held hostage by the airlines, not to mention having to pay for checked baggage and ticket price increases left and right.

Well, now for the disclaimer. I went to dinner with a friend at a Mexican restaurant. Yes, I have had 2 margaritas and am feeling the effects of lack of alcohol intake as of late.

Now for the reason for this blog. As the dust settled from the difficult week Leah and I had 2 weeks ago, she had to go out of town. For once, she was more hesitant to leave than I was to let her go. So, off to Boston she went on Friday (see her blog for more details). I think the additional time apart has been good for us, except for last night (another story for another time). The entire Braswell family has been looking forward to tonight, when Leah was to return. Yet the weather did not cooperate and the airline industry is holding my wife hostage. At least, that is how it feels to me. Leah made it from Boston to Atlanta tonight. But, the trip from Atlanta to Little Rock, will just have to wait another day.

In our conversation tonight, Leah and I agreed that there is a silver lining to all of this. What it is it you ask... The fact that Ross is only 18 months old and has no concept of time. He has no idea that even though I have been telling him ALL DAY that we would go to the airport and pick mama up today, that in reality she will not be home until tomorrow. This delay of 12 or so hours means absolutely nothing to him. All he knows is that his mama is coming home soon. I wish my brain could work in such a simple manner.

Our Walk

What a gift something so simple as a walk can be. There has been a lot of stress in my life the past two weeks and several changes to my life are being undertaken. This blog came from the need for more self reflection and I have started walking to improve my health. I think walking will help me improve the health of my body and my mind. As I am working through this tough time and my mind is crowded with so many different emotions and thoughts, I find it amazing how exercise and some fresh air can bring about a sense of clarity and calmness. 

Today, Ross and I went for a long walk. It has been a long time since I enjoyed exercising. However, today I really enjoyed myself. The walk started with Ross chattering away, but by the end he was quite and very relaxed. On our walk,  we looked for bunnies and Ross pointed out every trash can he saw, which was at almost every house since it was trash day in our neighborhood. 

I found myself thoroughly enjoying my walk today because of Ross. What a gift he is. I enjoyed having him point out every trash can and laughing as we walked through the sprinklers. I also enjoyed the quite end, just having his stroller to push and knowing he was there. I think I could really get into this walking thing.

Change

Change is not something I do very well. What can I say, I am a France by birth. Change has been a theme in the Braswell house over the past week and a half. The change that is on my mind tonight is our new sleeping arrangements. Yes, I who said I would never co-bed has allowed my child to sleep in my bed for the past 18 months. Well, maybe not the whole 18 months. He was probable 3 or 4 months old when it started. But yes, I have enjoyed and even encouraged Ross sleeping in our bed. Last week the time came for a change. I believe Leah has wanted this change for awhile, but as she is so loving and supportive of me and what I need/want, she never forced the issue! However, the events of last week made it apparent that something had to give. 

Last Sunday Ross fell asleep in our room and was placed in his crib. As is typical, he woke up. This night it happened around 12:30 AM (earlier than usually). In the past, I would have gotten him and put him in bed with me. I have held on to him sleeping with me, because I am scared of him growing up. I am not ready to let go of him as a baby. However, it was time to stop neglecting Leah because I was afraid of letting go a little of Ross. So, after 2 failed attempts at getting him back in his crib, I decided the twin bed mattress on the floor was the only way. It worked. I got him to sleep and got up without him arousing. The next night, we put him to sleep in his own room. Ross and I snuggled in his room and he fell asleep on his big bed. We are now on night 8 of this new routine. He still wakes up early in the morning between 3 and 4 AM, but instead of letting him get in bed with us, I help him fall back asleep on the twin bed in his room. It has actual been a nice change. Still an adjustment at times. But isn't that what life is about- learning to make adjustments as we go.  

I will always be afraid of the changes that come with Ross growing up. But, as my head was on the pillow next to his tonight, and I watched my child relax and give in to sleep, I realized that one thing will never change. He will always be my baby. No matter how big he becomes and what changes we go through, nothing can change the fact in my heart he is my little boy, my baby.

Great Joy in Something So Small... Water

A little history before we get to today's main topic- Water. 

About a week ago Leah and I had to re-evaluate our relationship. We both had to take a step back to help us redefine who were are as partners, as mothers, and as selves. The therapy has started, both with a therapist and with self reflection. This is where the blog came form. I am trying to find my inner strength and self. In other words, I am strengthening my steps. One step and one day at a time.

Now let's talk about water. I have always enjoyed a hot bath, a steaming shower, a trip to the beach,  and dip in a cool pool. Water is something I craved during pregnancy. When I was first breastfeeding, I could not get enough. There were days when Ross was an infant that I would drink 4 Liters a day. Yes, I said 4 liters. I know this because I drink from a Nalgene. I would drink 4 Nalgenes a day.  I drank water so much when I was first breastfeeding because I was paranoid about my milk supply. I was scared I would not have enough to feed Ross. Well, 18 months after his birth I can look back and laugh at my paranoia. I had more milk than Ross knows what to do with!! 

Ross has been the biggest joy in Leah and my relationship. As we were having relationship problems last week, Ross was there to give us a hug or share his amazing smile with us. Just as I drank water to feed Ross as an infant, today he used water to feed me in my infancy on this new journey of self strengthening. I think the pictures below will show you what I mean! He is an amazing spirit wrapped in a small, but perfect package. I thank God for sharing him with Leah and I. I thank Leah for being such an amazing wife and more importantly an amazing mother to our son. Now for the pictures... 

A Giant Leap

As usual, my perfectionism has held me back. I have had a difficult past two weeks, and am learning to let go in many different areas. Tonight, I am letting go of my fear of blogging. I have been fearful to put myself into the blogging world for many reasons... I am a terrible speller, not as eloquent a writer as my wife, and fear that no one would be interested in my hum drum life. Well, I realized this is a tool to share my story. But, I am not sharing my story with just anyone. I am finally sharing my story with myself. So here goes...

I have been a wife for almost 8 years, a mother for 18 months, and a doctor (real doctor- out of training) for a year. I have allowed my life to get caught up in the happenings of those around me, my wife, my son, and my patients. Over the past week I have had a true wake up call. Now, I need to learn to get caught up in myself. To many this may sound selfish, but after realizing that motherhood can lead to neglecting a spouse, it can also lead to neglecting self. As my wife is learning to take time for herself and we are working on being partners and not just mothers, I too have to take some time and find myself. This blog is my attempt at telling my story for those who want to listen, but mostly for telling it to myself.